Sometimes, it's easier said than done.

“And I told him, I said: "One day you're going to miss the subway because it's not going to come. One of these days, it's going to break down and it's not going to come around and everyone else will just wait for the next one or will take the bus, or walk, or run to the next station: they will go on with their lives. And you're not going to be able to go on with your life! You'll be standing there, in the subway station, staring at the tube. Why? Because you think that everything has to happen perfectly and on time and when you think it's going to happen! Well guess what! That's not how things happen! And you'll be the only one who's not going to be able to go on with life, just because your subway broke down. So you know what, you've got to let go, you've got to know that things don't happen the way you think they're going to happen, but that's okay, because there's always the bus, there's always the next station...you can always take a cab.” 
― C. JoyBell C.

Sometimes, it's easier said than done. 

I have recently come to a point in my life where I am finally beginning to live 'freely' again. Something I have not done for a very lone time, a little over a decade to be precise.  The overwhelming, lethargic feeling of fear haunts me today & I am finding the struggle to reach the shower a difficult one. Laziness weights heavily on my shoulders, and shame rests on my back. Even though I have accomplished something brilliant & powerful. Something many like me cannot even dream to accomplish. Something I myself, only 6 years passed never thought possible. And how strange to find myself here in this state of perplexed anxiety after conditioning myself through yoga & meditation  and proper nutrition the last two months & convincing , perhaps even tricking, myself into believing that I was in fact "ready" and "fine". Only to find myself here, unbalanced. Struggling to find that perfect sync between mind & body & soul. But solitude always was my greatest friend and foe. Thus becoming my greatest of downfalls. I want to be the mother I need to be to my sons. I want to be the wife I need to be for my husband. The daughter I need to be to my parents. The sister, to my siblings. And of course the friend. I have so many things in my present life to be grateful for, I do not have the time to waste on such thoughts of  gloom & doom & despair. I am bigger & better than this. The ability to concentrate and to use your time well is everything if you want to succeed anywhere.

But sometimes, it's just easier said than done.